The Street Names Of Stornoway (Part 4 of many)

23 10 2009

Cannery Road

There is a much misguided view that Stornoway’s Cannery Road was named after the large factory built by Lord Leverhulme to process and ‘can’ the fish caught for his ‘MacFisheries’ empire.

The name of this street actually comes from much further back in time and was coined in honour of the old Burlesque theatre that used to stand there. Cannery Road was originally known as ‘Can-Can’ Road, after the popular dance featuring blones in frilly dresses doing high kicks and flashing their drarsh.

The theatre, known as ‘Maw-lin Ruadach’ was build in 1885 by a consortium of local businessmen keen on introducing the cultural elite of Stornoway to the latest dances and fashions from Paris. But because of the risqué nature of the acts who performed there, the businessmen had a great deal of trouble finding a suitable plot of ground in the town centre on which to build the theatre and had to resort instead to a barren strip of land in what was then the outskirts of Stornoway. Because of the vast amount of naked flesh on display in the theatre, this areas of town was nicknamed ‘The Butt-ery’ and was off-limits for all decent and upstanding citizens.

Many of Stornoway’s most famous artists (including “Two Ewes” Lautrec, well-known colourist and shepard with a very small flock) made the burlesque house their ‘local’ and could be seen there most nights drinking Absinthe, being poor and insulting each others ‘inferior’ work (much like any normal evening in present-day An Lanntair).

The Maw-lin Ruadhach survived until well in to the 1930’s, until an unfortunate incident involving the entire Church Session of a local FP Church on a ‘fact finding’ visit came to light in the Stornoway Gazette.

Newton Street

Originally named in honour of Sir Issac Newton the famous scientist, whose granny came from Stornoway. Young Newton used to come to Stornoway on his holidays and it was here that he first described his ‘three laws of motion sickness’, following an impressively bad bout of vomiting on the ferry. Newton also discovered his Law of Gravir-tation whilst visiting an auntie in South Lochs. Newton fell asleep under the only tree in the village and was awoken by a guga (which had been hung out to dry) falling on his head. And the rest was history, apart from an unfortunate Gazette sub-editors mistake of swapping ‘guga’ for ‘apple’, as he had run out of the letter ‘u’.

Advertisements

Actions

Information

2 responses

23 10 2009
The Guireans

Re the otherwise excellent article on Newton’s discovery of the Law of Gravity, we feel compelled to point out a minor historical inaccuracy – the object which fell on his head in Gravir was, of course, a sgarbh and not a guga.

The guga fallacy is common among amateur researchers, and comes about because Newton almost discovered the same thing the previous year under very similar circumstances while visiting his other auntie (Dolina) on the road up to Ness. On that occasion, however, the prevailing Niseach force 12 gale blew the guga blew away before it got near Newton’s head, so he neffer noticed it. Had he done so, the mutual attraction of objects with mass would be described today by the Law of Galson-tation.

In fact the same thing happened the year before that at auntie Bellag’s in Point as well. That time it was a duck (or torrrrrnag, as it is known in the district) And had it not been appropriated in mid-fall by some grasping, devious and unprincipled Rubhach who happened to be passing, we’d have had the Law of Garrabost-tation

25 10 2009
problemchildbride

The 3 laws of motion sickness – fantastic!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




%d bloggers like this: